I stand on the edge of darkness, shadows reaching out with long waving arms trying to pull me forward into a black abyss.
I want to let go and be carried by whatever force is out there. This is the only way I can be absolved from the responsibility of my plans, my actions, my weaknesses.
Where will I be taken if I yield? It won’t be on the wings of heaven or in the strong arms of a raging torrent. I will be tossed hither and thither, no progress, no purpose. I will just be at the mercy of dark formless beings with an agenda of differing plans but with the one goal of dragging me down to Hell and keeping me out of the reach of redeeming Grace, and the sunlight and the warmth of God’s love.
I feel the warmth and brightness of something wonderful around my shoulders. I struggle to turn and face this brightness, and in doing so, turn my back on the hungry black pit which is trying to claim me for its own.
I face the light. I cannot see the source. I feel the warmth soaking into my skin.
My eyes close, but I am no longer on the edge of blackness but at an entrance to light.
Somehow I know that if I step out into this light, this warm, this inestimable brightness, that the ground will not fall away beneath my feet. I will stand on solid rock, warm arms will enfold me.
I hear a deep whisper, “ Come, my child, take the first step and I will be with you for the rest”.
I recognize the voice of God, the steady grip of His hand on mine, and know for a surety that though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil’.
God is my life, my absolution, my purpose, and my ultimate reason to ‘be’, and He walks beside me all the way.
W.B. April 2009.